Burdened by existence

Well, there comes a time when you really wonder the direction in which your life is headed. You wonder where is life taking you, what is the path ahead. You see your friends and others catching up on things in a easy manner. You get the sense that you are the oddity of the universe which wans't supposed to be. You see that existence in essence is nothing more than a mirage. You desire strongly for the pain and the suffering to be over. You wish why don't I just pull the plug and make it easy.

It might be a huge relief to all the haters out there .Above all it might be the best blessing that I can get. After all it might be either the end of everything or the beginning of everything. Either way I believe it could be taken as emancipation. 

Death or moksha as ancient philosophy refers to it, ought to be the ultimate blessing. That's what we all achieve in the long run. It is the inevitability of our existence. Still we do all in our capacity to defer and postpone it. Is really life the gift which we should prolong?

Pain and misery seem to flow from life, Without life, without existence, everything would be serene and calm. Everything would be beautiful and nothing would hurt. I wish I were a mountain, or a rock, or perhaps just dust. Having nothing to bother about, nothing to run to, nothing to run from. Wouldn't that be just perfect ! Why on earth did I have to turn out to be sentient !! 

Damn, I envy those lucky b*st**ds who haven't got a clue of what's going on around them. Other times I just pity myself for imagining I am aware. Let us consider ants, mosquitoes, bacteria, viruses, etc. Do you think they have got the slightest idea of what humans are or what humans do? Is the universe in any sense ever going to be comprehendible to them? Perhaps these are the wrong questions. The real question is, Whose ants are we??